About a week ago as I was getting ready, putting my make up on, I started to get agitated about my face. I could feel the pimples coming and I was angry. That “time” of the month was coming and my face was the first to show signs of it. I had run out of my face wash/moisturizer and hadn’t had time to go and buy more. With no time to do anything about it, I finished getting ready and headed out with the family.
One of the stops we made that day was to the dollar store. The boys had been so good that, as a treat, we let them all pick out some candy. While checking out I saw what I thought to be name brand face wash. Relieved that I was able to find face wash and moisturizer so cheap, I grabbed two boxes and smiled knowing that I would soon be able to properly wash my face.
After two days of using the face wash I noticed my skin tightening, but not in a “wow, this stuff is amazing” kind of way. It was more of a “holy crap, why is the skin under my eyes on fire and my face looking like the Sahara Desert?” In a panic I got a fraction of an inch away from my husbands face and said “oh my gosh – look at my skin! It looks so gross! Why is this stuff not working?!” To which my loving husband replied “you look beautiful, stop stressing”.
“But Jay, my skin looks like it’s cracking!”
“Lori, you look beautiful but it’s the dollar store brand what were you expecting?”
“no, it’s (insert the brand name), it must’ve been an overstock or something”
Jason just shook his head and continued to do what he was doing. I went about my business but still stressed about the burning under my eyes. A couple of nights later as I was starting my nightly face washing routine I looked at the product I had purchased at the dollar store. To my embarrassment, it was, in fact, the dollar store brand. Much chagrined, I wandered downstairs to Jason.
“The jokes on me” I told him.
“What do you mean?” he asked.
“You were right – it was the dollar store brand”
He didn’t say anything, but he gave me “that” face. You know, the one that makes me want to simultaneously kiss him and punch him.
The next day I was able to go to the store and purchase my much-needed face wash, moisturizer and under eye cream. I’ve only used it for one day and I already feel the difference in my skin. But for one week I was in a panic about my changing face; the lines that were showing up, the dryness and the redness. I’m not really one that freaks out over aging, I happen to like the laugh wrinkles on the sides of my eyes and my mouth. Maybe it’s because I’m always told that I don’t look my age (I’ll be 37 in October) or that I truly haven’t noticed that much of a change. Whatever the reason I just haven’t cared – until last week when this face wash debacle happened.
There have been times in our relationship that I have been upset at my husband for not “reacting” about things. He doesn’t show excitement, well, rarely shows excitement. I’m on the other end of the spectrum – I’m easily excitable. This was one of those times where I was grateful my husband is who he is. Through this whole week of me freaking out it was his simple, but strong, statements that I needed. I was walking through unfamiliar territory; feeling like I was growing old and unattractive. Each time I stressed about it to my husband, he simply stated “you’re beautiful”.
I never want to stress about aging again. I’m going to age – it’s inevitable. Instead of worrying about it I’m going to embrace it. I thought I had been doing that this whole time until I was challenged by cheaply made face wash. And like other challenges in my life, I freaked out. It was one of those times that I really should’ve relied on my faith and my God. No, I’m not saying I should’ve prayed to God over better moisturizer but I should’ve asked him to give me comfort over aging. Yes, it is important to use healthy products on your body, but it’s more important to have a healthy attitude about life.
I’m an habitual stresser, it’s something I’ve had to consistently work on. When I am stressed I need to remember what it says in Matthew 11:28 Come to me all who are weak and weary and I will give you rest.
Thank you, God, for creating me and loving me, even in the midst of my troubles (and wrinkles, lol).